Happy New Year Ladies!! I hope you placed in your NYE resolutions the promise to take more time for yourself and your pleasure. Speaking of which, I had time during Christmas Holidays to run a very interesting poll about oral sex (perfect topic to go for during dinners and drinks!).
Since I shared that cunnilingus gap do actually exists, and so women are getting less oral sex than men, I started getting very fascinated by how to contribute to fill this gap.
Indeed drinks and the all festive atmosphere helped me getting lots of quite frank and honest answers! So, I asked men and women separately how do they perform cunnilingus and how they like to receive it.
As you might guess answers didn’t quite matched so I created this guide to give you a list of dos and donts.
Before giving you what you are expecting, so tips on how to perform oral sex on a woman, I want to set few points:
Once again we go back to the point where sex is a taboo topic, and even couples struggle to talk about it. Several women from my poll don’t like cunnilingus because they never found someone able to make this experience pleasurable for them. When I asked if they told their partner(s), or helped/guided them in any way.. most of them said no.
So girls, obviously you don’t know what you can’t experience on your own, but you must speak up, share how you feel, like, dislike to make this a great experience for yourself. We can’t, after all, blame just the men for that. Boys, if someone is hopefully reading this, please ask her what she likes; pay attention on how her body reacts to you touch, let her guide you.
This is as true for men as for women. There are many other things you could to together so no obligation here, if that’s not your thing, it’s ok.
What a woman likes another may not.. so this is not the magic infallible guide. There is no such thing, I’m afraid.
DON’T: please please and please guys.. as much as you like giving oral sex please do not go straight there like you are starving and about to eat your last meal placing your entire face in it.
DO: tease tease and tease. The key to great orgasm is to make it rise slowly. Titillating anticipation of our partner’s touch is just amazing. So start playing around the vulva, between the legs, touch it, lick it, blow on it, stimulate the area the way you prefer but gently. It doesn’t have to last hours.. but nigher 30 sec.
DON’T: go to the clitoris right away. It’s the last part you touch when you’ll see she is really asking for it.
DON’T: the myth of spelling the alphabet with your tongue on the clit to bring us to climax is pretty wrong. You could rather do circles or up and down movements increasing speed gradually. She might like you to use all tongue to feel more pressure or just the tip.
DO: some will like soft touch others a stronger stimulation. Again, talk to each other on that. If it’s the second option, you could help yourself with fingers on the clitoris too or perhaps use a clitoral vibrator (also to avoid getting too tired) or sucking could work too.
DO: remember to go slow and to increase the speed as you see her body is asking for more. Let her ask for more, you are leading here.
DO: if you want to give her a double stimulation you can also stimulate her G Spot with a “come here” fingers’ movement while inside her.
Perhaps my tips on how to perform oral sex on a woman will help on your next time and then practice will give you a great boost!
Truth is, I’ll stick to my first point: the key to great sex is communication. Beside techniques, which can always be learned and improved, if we don’t share with our partner(s) what we want and like, if we don’t overcome taboos on sex we’ll never fully enjoy such a wonderful experience.
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